In Chapter 22 of Bereishit (Genesis), Jacob and Esav have a spiritual collision, an encounter that is outside of physical boundaries and showcases the power that prayers can have. Chapter 23 follows with the physical encounter of the two brothers, the first time they have seen each other in 20 years. This is an encounter that certainly is influenced by the twins’ history – both during their younger years (growing up in Isaac and Rebecca’s home) and the prayer-encounter that occurred just the night before their reunion.
“He [Jacob] himself went on ahead (of his camp) and bowed low to the ground seven times until he was near his brother.” And Jacob, weary of a further attempt on his life by his brother Esav, attempted to calm his brother’s anger.
“Esav ran to greet him. He
embraced him and, falling on his neck, he kissed him; and they wept.” But Esav, having
recognized God’s will, submitting to Jacob’s physical and spiritual destiny to
be blessed ahead of him, greeted Jacob as a beloved brother. Jacob, moved by Esav’s warm welcome, relaxes
and finally displays his joy at seeing his brother after such a long
separation. Momentarily, the two
brothers forget their differences and enjoy each other’s company. But the moment is fleeting.
“Looking about, he [Esav] saw the women and children. ‘Who,’ he asked, ‘are these with
you?’” As the
immediate excitement of seeing his brother subsided, Esav desires to meet his
brother’s new family.
“He [Jacob] answered, ‘The children with whom God has favored
your servant.’ Then the maids, with
their children, came forward and bowed low; next Leah, with her children, came
forward and bowed low; and last, Joseph and Rachel came forward and bowed low.” And the fleeting moment
of lightheartedly basking in each other’s presence passed. Jacob’s wariness returned, as he humbled
himself, calling himself Esav’s “servant.”
And as instructed, his wives and children also showed great deference to
their brother-in-law and uncles.
“And he [Esav] asked, ‘What do you mean by all this company
which I have met?’ And Esav innocently asks, ‘Why have you given
me so much of your livestock? I, too,
have plenty for myself and all my household.”
“He [Jacob] answered, ‘To gain my lord’s favor.’” To make sure that your
wrath of twenty years ago did not still linger, that you did not desire to kill
me and all those travelling with me.
“Esav said, ‘I have enough, my brother; let what you have remain
yours.’” Despite
all you have taken from me – my birthright and my firstborn blessing – I have
nonetheless worked to provide for myself and my household. I no longer hold those against you; I recognize
the Divine will that I will not overcome you.
Yes, I have moved on from my younger years and have finally reached an
internal peace; you owe me nothing.
“But Jacob said, ‘No, I pray you; if you would do me this favor,
accept from me this gift; for to see your face is like seeing the face of God,
and you have received me favorably.
Please accept my present which has been brought to you, for God has favored
me and I have plenty.’” “Please,”
says Jacob, “Accept what I have offered to, in some small way, atone for all
that I have taken from you.” For while Esav had accepted defeat, had accepted
the loss of his birthright and the loss of his blessing of the firstborn, and
had even accepted that Jacob’s prayer won Divine favor over his own…Jacob felt
remorse that he had usurped the birthright and the blessing, he felt sorrow
that his brother, who had now began the process of teshuva (repentance),
was not able to have those blessings himself.
“And when he [Jacob] urged him, he [Esav] accepted.” And when Esav saw that Jacob’s persistence would
not end, he accepted the gifts of his brother.
“And [Esav] said, ‘Let us start on our journey, and I will
proceed at your pace.’”
And Esav prepared to remain reunited with his brother, to travel to Seir
side-by-side.
“But he [Jacob] said to him, ‘My lord knows that the children
are frail and that the flocks and herds, which are nursing, are a care to me;
if they are driven hard a single day, all the flocks with die. Let my lord go on ahead of his servant, while
I travel slowly, at the pace of the cattle before me and at the pace of the
children, until I come to my lord in Seir.’” But Jacob did not wish to remain with his
brother, Esav. “Go ahead of me,” he
urges his brother, “for I will follow you at a slower pace.” Although Jacob’s intention were not to see
his brother again, for they had been individually successful while apart and he
was unsure if such success was possible together; he was unsure if his brother
could remain at peace with him.
“Then Esav said, ‘Let me assign to you some of the men who are
with me.’” So Esav offered Jacob some of his men, fearing that
Jacob would not follow him to Seir, and wishing that he and his brother could
finally live in harmony.
“But he [Jacob] said, ‘Oh no, my lord is too kind to me!’” But Jacob, knowing that he would not be
seeing his brother again, would not accept Esav’s men.
“So Esav started back that day on his way to Seir. But Jacob journeyed on to Succot, and built a
house for himself and made stalls for his cattle; that is why he place was
called Succot.” So
the two brothers again parted ways, to live in their separate lands, and only
to be reunited again at the time of their father’s death:
“And Jacob came to his father Isaac at Mamre, at Kiriat-Arba – now Hebron
– where Abraham and Isaac sojourned.
Isaac was a hundred and eighty years old when he breathed his last and
died. He was gathered to his kin in ripe
old age; and he was buried by his sons Esav and Jacob” (Bereishit
35:27-29).
At
this point I wonder of the importance that both Esav and Jacob buried their
father, Isaac. Earlier in the Torah we see
that both Isaac and Ishmael participate in burying their father, Avraham, as
well. What is the significance of both pairs
of brothers – the one destined to be a patriarch of the Jewish people and the
other a rather un-esteemed (fairly or unfairly) character – coming together to
bury their fathers? In both instances,
the Torah immediately follows the burial with a listing the descendents of the “lesser”
son (Ishmael and Esav, respectively).
Why is it that their lineage is worthy of mention at this time? I believe it is because despite the many bad
traits these two characters display, they are fulfilling the important commandment
to honor their parents (father, in this case).
For all their faults, they are able to let go of their gripes with their
more-favored brothers for the sake of their fathers whom they have the
obligation to bury and respect, even in his death.
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