Parshat VaYishlach: When Prayer's Collide

Bereishit (Genesis) 32:25-32

And Jacob was left alone and there a man wrestled him until the break of dawn.  When he [the man] perceived he could not overcome him, he struck the socket of his hip.  So Jacob's hip-socket was dislocated as he wrestled with him.

Then he said: Let me go, for dawn has broken.

And [Jacob] said: I will not let you go unless you bless me.

And he said to him: What is your name?

He replied: Jacob.

He said: No longer will it be said that your name is Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God (Elokim) and with men, and have prevailed.

And Jacob asked him, and said: Tell me, I pray thee, your name.

And he said: Why is it that you ask after my name?

And Jacob called the name of the place Peniel: For I have seen God (Elokim) face-to-face, yet my life was preserved.

And the sun rose upon him as he passed over Peniel, and he limped upon his thigh.

  Wow.  How much is there contained in these eight short verses!  Like Ya'akov's dream last week, there is so much mystery and yet so much meaning.  The mystery, in a way, even creates the meaning.  It allows our tradition -- from the Sages until today -- to interpret and reinterpret the story in ways that are always relevant, always able to speak to the spirit of the age.  Artist and poet Charles Baudelaire said during the formative years of Modern painting: One must be of one's time.  This is one aspect of Judaism I particularly love -- our ability to take old verses and apply new meaning.  The ability to be constantly relevant is certainly, in my mind, one of the greatest uniquenesses of Judaism; one of the key factors in our ability to rebound and thrive no matter how much we have been held down by the rest of the world throughout history. 

Back to the parsha.  Who is this man that Jacob wrestled with?  Our sages say an angel, but if so, which angel and why?  What does it mean that Jacob wrestled with God and men?  Based on the confrontation of Jacob and Esav that was set up in the preceding verses and finished in the succeeding verses, I will give an answer to these questions.

And the messengers returned to Jacob, saying: We came to thy brother Esav, and moreover he cometh to meet thee, and four hundred men with him.  (Bereishit 32:7)

This caused Jacob to fear for the life of all those traveling with him.  He had fled from Esav twenty years earlier and based on his entourage it appears that Esav's desire to murder his brother remains.   So Jacob takes action.  He strategically separates his camp so that if attacked, not everyone will be killed, not everything will be lost.  At least some have hope of surviving.  Only after doing this does Jacob turn to God in prayer:

And Jacob said: O God of my father Avraham, and God of my father Yitzchak.  O Lord, who said to me, "Return unto thy country, and to thy kindred, and I will do good with you."  I am not worthy of all the mercies, and of all the truth, which Thou hast shown unto Thy servant; for with my staff I crossed the Jordan and now I have become two camps.  Deliver me, please, from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esav.  For I fear him, lest he come and smite me, the mother with the children.  And Thou said, "I will surely do thee good, and make thy seed as the sand of the sea, which cannot be numbered for multitude."  (Bereishit 33:10-13)

I have heard Jacob's prayer criticized for the first sentence -- not stating that it was also his God -- and for not taking place before he made arrangements for his camps.  But I don't understanding this reading or interpretation.  Jacob humbles himself before his God.  He admits an error he may have made.  He speaks out of fear for his life, for the uncertainty of what will happen next.  How can we criticize the genuine prayer of someone that is praying from a spot that we have not been in ourselves?  And, just like Avraham going to Egypt, we must exhaust the resources God has put in front of us to help ourselves instead of relying on blind faith; Jacob did so.  The way that Jacob's prayer is read, however, is of little relevance to what comes next -- for certainly Jacob's prayer reached the gates of heaven and was received by God.  And that night, came Ya'akov's struggle.  Why did it come that night, just after his prayers?  Perhaps because he was not the only one praying.  Perhaps because his prayers were in conflict with another's.  Perhaps because while Ya'akov was praying for his camp's safety, Esav was praying for success in his 20-year old mission to murder his brother.

There is, of course, a big variance in the moral worth of these two prayers.  But that does not mean that both were not directed to the God of Isaac and Abraham, the father and grandfather of both pray-ers.  Certainly God hears all prayers -- those of Jews and those of non-Jews; those that are selfish and those that are caring; those of the righteous and those of the wicked.  All prayers are received in heaven - those like the prayer of Ya'akov and those like the prayer of Esav.  [Could this be similar to the prayer of the Jews for peace in Israel today vs. the prayer of the Muslims for the destruction of the Jewish state and people?]  And what happens when the prayer of the two twins collided?  Esav was destined to be a great man, a man of the field but a man who feared God while working in the field.  He was supposed to marry Leah (see Rashi's commentary).  Jacob was supposed to be a man of study, the spiritual compliment to his brother.  He was destined to marry Rachel.  The two were supposed to live in harmony, but things did not turn out that way.

"And Jacob was left alone and there a man wrestled him until the break of dawn."  The mysterious man was an angel - the angel created by Esav's prayer.  And the prayer of Jacob collided with the prayer of Esav.

"When he [Esav] perceived he could not overcome him, he struck the socket of his hip.  So Jacob's hip-socket was dislocated as he wrestled with him."  And Esav realized that he would never be able to overcome his brother, Jacob.  So Esav, gathering his remaining strength, inflicted what damage he could unto him.

"Then he [Esav] said: Let me go, for dawn has broken.
"And [Jacob] said: I will not let you go unless you bless me."  And Jacob wanted his brother to recognize that he had not just won a physical victory.  'Not by might, and not by power, but by [God's] spirit' (Zecheriah 4:6).  Jacob had won a victory endorsed by the heavens. 

"And he [Esav] said to him: What is your name.
"He replied: Jacob.
"He said: No longer will it be said that your name is Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God (Elokim) and with men, and have prevailed."  No longer shall your name be called Jacob, for you have not only physically overcome me when you took my birthright (Bereishit 25:29-34) and when you took my blessing of the firstborn (Bereishit 27).  You have also beaten me spiritually, in heaven, with the approval of God.

"And Jacob asked him, and said: Tell me, I pray thee, your name."  Why did Jacob ask the name of his own brother?  For he could hardly recognize him, for it was not until now that Esav recognized the Divine will.  It was here that Esav recognized and accepted that he would never overcome Jacob; and he blessed Jacob, recognizing his brother's righteousness, and began the process of teshuva (a "return" to a God-driven life).

"And he [Esav] said: Why is it that you ask after my name?"  And he said, 'Please do not gloat over me.  I have submitted before you, recognized that you are to be destined for greatness over me.'  So Jacob did not inquire further.

"And Jacob called the name of the place Peniel: For I have seen God (Elokim) face to face, yet my life was preserved."  And Jacob was grateful for the blessings he had received, for the fulfillment of his prayer, for being favored in the eyes of God.

"And the sun rose upon him as he passed over Peniel, and he limped upon his thigh."  And as the day came Jacob still carried with him the limp - the sadness - that victory had to come at the expense of his brother.